Episode # 50
I open this episode, with a dedication to Debra Lilly the family member how has pass away this month.
Things that you are doing don’t matter a whole lot when it comes to family emergencies. Family emergencies, You can’t plan for they come right out of the blue and what ever you’re working on, no matter what it is or how important it is. You have to set aside in order to take care of the family emergency.
When you’re caring for someone It’s pretty much like having another child in the house. They need someone with them 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. So when things happen that you need to believe the house, you have to find someone to stay with the one that your caring for. You can’t just pick them up and travel to take care of the emergency or anything else. So we find ourselves in the same situation as we did in episode number 34. Not being able to do things you know you should.
I know with Mama with her dementia condition she doesn’t understand what’s going on around her. She’s having trouble recognizing us and were with her all the time. I know that she does not understand what and why we need to leave to take care of this emergency.
After having the situation that we had an episode number 34, we have been able to locate a lady from the church that is willing to come and sit with mom when we need her to with ample notification. However, this family emergency happened and there was no time to notify this lady. So I needed to stay with mom.
With Mama’s dementia she doesn’t recognize us, sometimes, although she knew the rest of the family, with her dementia she no longer remembers who they are. She no longer knows who some of her own children are at times. So you can’t just pick her up and go anywhere. You have to have someone stay with her because she’s almost like a child.
Spring is here, summaries just around the corner and yours things in his house and around this house that I need to get taking care of. I’m having trouble doing these things because a mamas dementia. I know more go get started on something, and Mama needs something. I know more get back to doing what I was doing get concentrating on that and Mama needs something again. It’s a day by day vicious cycle.
Stephanie and I’ve been talking about getting this lady from the church to come in one or 2 days a week. Now, though, that summer is here, Stephanie is out of work for the summer. We may not get this lady through the summer. However, this winter when Stephanie goes back to work, We may get this lady to come stay with mom. So I can get some things done that I want and need to get done. We’re just not sure what, when, or even if will get this lady.
As you take care of someone they get to the point where all they want is you to be the one to take care of them. And I honestly think that’s where mamas at. She wants me and only me at times. So anyone else who’s trying to take care of her, has a difficult time doing so.
With the above being said though I honestly believe that Mama has my son and I mixed up. You see, there are times when Michael Junior can get them to do things that I’ve been trying to get them to do with a fair amount of ease. I’m not sure at those times, who she thinks I am. I’m not sure whether she thinks I’m my father, my stepfather or if she thinks I may just be someone trying to get her to do something that she doesn’t want to do.
I’ve said all of this just to say that, Life has a way of throwing obstacles at you out of the blue. That was the case this week for the family. You see, Stephanie has lost her sister. And although they were not as close as they should of been it’s still a very sad time for the family.
I asked myself this question. Is the family repeating itself? You see for the 1st 3 years of Stephanie and I marriage we were going to funerals every 6 months. We were going to funerals for either her family, my family or yes even friends of ours. Most of whom were at our wedding. You see, it’s only been about 6 months between the 2 funerals now. It makes me stop and think whether or not history is repeating itself.
With having to family deaths so close together. It really makes me stop and think, mom is 84. She has dementia. It really makes me stop and appreciate the time that we’ve have. Cause you never know when you got a be out of time. Time becomes more precious with those you love the older you get.
One thing I do know, is that death is not the end. Death is only the beginning of the afterlife. Each and every one of us will face the judgment seat of Christ, and account for our lives. I also believe that besides being a moneymaker, the funerals and the memorial services or whatever else you may have their, that’s more for your family members that you’re leaving behind. So they have some way of saying goodbye to you. I don’t believe it’s for you because you’re not there. Your in presence of God, accounting for your life.
Finally, I’ll wrap up by just saying once again that this episode of care giving for dementia is dedicated to Debra Lilly the family member that we’ve lost, and although we were not as close as we should of been, to the rest of Debra’s family that may hear this episode. I just want to say I’m very sorry, very sorry indeed for your loss.